You know the answer

Cute sleeves, no? I wish there were more wedding dresses with creative sleeves!
Photo from little white dress by bonnie b. in Teen Vogue Fashion Click.

A week ago, I heard a story about a couple who were planning to get married in the church near my home. They came in and inspected the place, asked the priest a couple of questions. After some small talk, the girl brought up something that she seemed to have been meaning to ask since the beginning. She brought out a sketch of a dress, showed it to the priest, and asked, "Father, do you have strict rules on the bridal gown? Can I wear a dress like this?"

The priest took one look at the sketch, sighed, and said, "We don't have explicit rules on what you can or can't wear on your wedding day. But I'm sure you already know my answer to your question."

Now, why did the priest say this? When it comes to modesty, many people get turned off by the existence of explicit rules. From the obvious rules like "No plunging neckline," "No backless," "No diaper shorts," to the seemingly OA "Short skirts should end just above the knee," or "No collar lower than two finger-widths below the collar bone," these rules seem too stiff and tyrannical. It's not at all surprising: Clothing is a form of expression, and don't we all just love to fight for our freedom of expression?

That said, what the bride-to-be did was try to get the priest to say "yes" when in fact she knew all along that the answer was "no." We vain girls know there are rules, but we don't want to follow these rules so we try to find a loophole--an excuse! If a lady really understands that--beyond being merely a form of expression--clothing is a way of loving the One who made us in His image and likeness, then she will really take these rules seriously.

If you think about it, they aren't "rules" at all--at least not the way traffic rules are rules. The high standards in good  dressing actually stem from the desire to please the people you respect, the people you love. On your wedding day, your dress should express the love you have for God and your husband-to-be, as they are the most important on that big day. Obviously, when you give a very special gift, you would wrap it properly, right? What more if this special gift is you?

After a long silence, the hubby-to-be teased, "Father, you're right. Maybe if she could wear that, I should be in a tank and shorts!"

"And I should be in swimming trunks!" the priest added, laughing.    

I don't know whether the couple decided in the end to tie the knot in that church and redesign the dress, or if they persisted to look for a church that would allow the bride-to-be to wear the gown in the sketch. But one thing is for sure: when it comes to dressing well, women shouldn't look at the latest trends. Clothing is a form of expression, but it's more than a pastiche of your favorite fashion mag looks! Forget vanity--real beauty, expressed in one's clothing choices, stems from love, which is found deep inside a person.

Doesn't that just mean that a wedding dress, more than any other attire for special occasions, should be a dress that reflects a true, pure, beautiful, and self-giving kind of love?


"After all there is something about a wedding-gown prettier than in any other gown in the world."-Douglas William Jerrold